Wait–we’re doing this again?
Many have approached me, deep concern on their eager faces.
“Why, Fearful?” they plead. “Why do you let them do such awful, unspeakable things to your beautiful podcast feed?”
I always know what they’re talking about. They’re referring to the Chads, and their eldritch power over me. I wish I could give them a better understanding–I lack that understanding myself. Perhaps I should never have angered the Swamp Witch. Maybe it was a bad idea to plunder that unmarked grave in the abandoned cemetery at the end of the dirt road. Arguably, I shouldn’t have dropped that bloody hitchhiker off, as he requested, next to the girls’ sleepaway camp. I definitely shouldn’t have offered him a free sharpening for his knife. I mean, what was I thinking?
We can’t be sure of the cause. All we can know at this point is that the Chads have a lot to say about Qanon, the astonishingly dumb Trump-related conspiracy we covered a few months ago. So now, dear listeners, I have no choice. My will is not my own. Welcome to Stupid Land.